:(
i hate crying over nothing. a flash of an incident here, a sudden reminder of the past there. enough to make me sob non stop and feel lousy for the rest of the day.
for what, i wonder.
the answer is getting clearer day by day. the only thing now would just be when he's willing to actually speak up about it.
i don't think i can stand the disappointments and pain much longer. it's so antagonizing to watch your phone, willing it to ring, and when it finally does, it's not from the person you most badly want to hear from.
my heart is dying. the least i can do is to let it die as quickly and painlessly as i can. unfortunately, this is not up to me.
